Last Updated on October 17, 2025 by Jennifer Davis
Let’s Talk About Your Will (No, It’s Not Too Early)
I get it. Thinking about a will feels like planning your own funeral. It’s morbid. It’s uncomfortable. It’s something you can always do “later.”
But here’s a story that changed my perspective. My friend Sarah, a healthy 35yearold, was in a minor car accident. She was fine, but it shook her. She realized that if things had gone differently, the state would have decided what happened to her apartment, her car, and the small investment account she’d been building. Her parents, who she wasn’t close with, would have gotten everything by default. Her best friend, who she wanted to have her beloved dog, would have had no legal claim. The whole mess would have been a heartbreaking burden on her family during the worst time of their lives.
That “what if” was enough. She finally made her will.
Creating a will isn’t about death. It’s about control. It’s an act of love and responsibility for the people you care about most. And I promise you, it’s not as complicated or as scary as it seems. Let’s break down exactly how to create a will as a total beginner in the US.
What Exactly Is a Will, Anyway?
At its heart, a will is a legal document that does three big things:
- It names who gets your stuff (your “beneficiaries”).
- It names a guardian for your minor children.
- It names an “executor”—the person you trust to carry out your wishes.
Without a will, you die “intestate.” That’s a fancy legal term for “you let the state decide.” Each state has its own default rules for who inherits, and I can tell you, they’re almost never what you’d actually want. Your partner you aren’t married to? They might get nothing. Your favorite niece? Not a dime. It creates a slow, expensive, and stressful legal process for your grieving family.
A will gives you the final say.
Getting Your Ducks in a Row: What You Need Before You Start
You don’t need to have it all figured out, but a little prep work makes the process smooth. Grab a notepad or open a document and start jotting down answers to these questions.
Who are the key players?
- Executor: This is your posthumous project manager. They’ll file the will with the court, pay your debts, and distribute your assets. Choose someone organized, trustworthy, and levelheaded. Ask them first! It’s a job, not a surprise.
- Guardian for Minor Children: This is often the toughest decision. Who would raise your kids with your values? Have a frank conversation with them. Also, name a backup.
- Beneficiaries: Who gets what? Be as specific as you can.
What do you actually own? Make a simple list. We’re talking house, car, bank accounts, investments, jewelry, that vintage guitar collection. You don’t need exact values, just a clear picture.
Here’s a pro tip from my own experience: Don’t get bogged down in the small stuff. You can write a line like “I leave my personal and household belongings to my sister, Jane Doe, and I trust her to distribute sentimental items as she sees fit.” This prevents you from having to list every single plate and book.
The Nuts and Bolts: How to Actually Create Your Will
Okay, you’ve got your list. Now, how do you turn it into a legal document? You have a few main paths.
1. The DIY Route: Online Will Kits & Software
This is the most popular starting point for beginners. Services like LegalZoom or Nolo guide you through a questionnaire and spit out a formatted will.
When it’s a good fit: If your situation is straightforward—you’re married, have kids, and your assets are simple. It’s also the most budgetfriendly option, often costing less than $100.
The catch: You get what you get. There’s no lawyer to spot unique issues. For example, if you have a child with special needs, a DIY will could accidentally make them ineligible for government benefits. If you have a complex family dynamic (let’s say, children from a previous marriage), this route can be risky.
Funny story: A friend used a DIY kit and, in a hurry, mistyped a beneficiary’s name. It took months of legal wrangling to fix what was essentially a typo. The lesson? Attention to detail is everything, even with a template.
2. The Gold Standard: Hiring an Estate Planning Attorney
For anything beyond the simplest situation, this is your best bet. An attorney provides personalized advice and ensures your will is ironclad.
When you really need one:
- You have a large estate (over the federal or state estate tax exemption, which is millions, but it’s worth checking).
- You own a business.
- You have concerns about a family member contesting the will.
- You have a blended family.
- You want to set up trusts for your beneficiaries.
Yes, it’s more expensive—anywhere from $300 to $1,200 on average. But think of it as insurance against a much more expensive and emotionally draining probate process later. You can find a qualified lawyer through your state’s bar association lawyer referral service.
3. The Handwritten (Holographic) Will
This is a will written entirely in your own handwriting, dated, and signed. Some states recognize them, but many do not, or they are subject to intense scrutiny.
My strong opinion? Don’t risk it. It should only be considered in a true, lastresort emergency. The potential for disputes and errors is just too high.
Making It Official: The Signing Ceremony
This is the most important step. A will isn’t valid unless it’s properly signed and witnessed. The rules vary by state, but the general gist is always the same.
You need to sign your will in front of at least two disinterested witnesses (usually three is safer). “Disinterested” means they aren’t named in the will as a beneficiary. They watch you sign, and then they sign it themselves, attesting that you appeared to be of sound mind and under no duress.
Here’s the kicker: In most states, the witnesses don’t need to read the will or know what’s in it. They are only witnessing your signature.
A notary is often required to make the document “selfproving,” which speeds up the probate process. It’s a good idea to have one present.
Do not just sign it by yourself and stick it in a drawer. That unsigned document is worthless.
Common Beginner Mistakes to Avoid
The biggest mistake I see people make is thinking a will is a “set it and forget it” document. Life happens. You need to update it.
- Getting married or divorced? In many states, marriage revokes an old will, and divorce nullifies gifts to an exspouse. But you can’t count on it. Update your will.
- Having a child? You need to formally name a guardian.
- Moving to a new state? Laws differ. Have your will reviewed by a local attorney.
- Forgetting about “nonprobate” assets. Assets with a designated beneficiary—like life insurance policies, IRAs, and 401(k)s—bypass your will entirely. The beneficiary form trumps the will every time. So, make sure those are up to date, too!
Your Will is Just the Start
A will is a core part of estate planning, but it’s not the whole story. A complete plan often includes two other powerful documents:
- A Financial Power of Attorney: This lets someone you trust manage your money and property if you become incapacitated.
- An Advance Healthcare Directive (Living Will): This outlines your medical wishes if you can’t speak for yourself.
Think of it as a fullspectrum plan for life’s “what ifs.” The USA.gov estate planning page is a great, unbiased resource to learn more about these documents.
Your Questions, Answered
What happens if I die without a will?
Your state’s “intestacy” laws take over. A courtappointed administrator will distribute your assets to your closest relatives according to a strict formula. Your unmarried partner, friends, and favorite charities get nothing. It’s a public, often lengthy, and expensive process called probate.
Can I just write my will on a napkin?
Please don’t. While a handful of states might recognize a “holographic” will under very specific conditions, it’s a legal minefield. The chances of it being rejected or contested are extremely high. Always opt for a formally typed and witnessed document.
How much does it cost to create a will?
It ranges from free (if you use a template and your own printer) to over a thousand dollars. A solid DIY online service is typically $50$150. An attorneydrafted will usually runs between $300 and $1,200, depending on complexity. It’s one of the most costeffective forms of insurance you’ll ever buy.
Do I need a lawyer to create a will?
Not always. If your affairs are very simple, a DIY kit can suffice. But if your situation has any complexity—a business, a special needs beneficiary, property in multiple states, or family conflict—the peace of mind an attorney provides is worth every penny.
Your Next Step: Just Start
Look, you’ve already done the hardest part: you started thinking about it. You’re reading this guide. That’s further than most people get.
So here’s my challenge to you. This week, take one small action. Make that list of your assets. Have that conversation with your potential executor. Or just bookmark a DIY will website to look at tomorrow.
Creating a will is a profound act of care. It’s you, taking responsibility from beyond the veil to make an unimaginably difficult time just a little bit easier for the people you love. You can do this. And you’ll feel an incredible sense of relief once it’s done.